Friday, January 26, 2007

Learning to say no

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Saying no is hard for a lot of people to do. Especially when it involves the people you love the most like your kids, your parents, or your SO. But we all need to learn how to say no and use it. When you get into the habit of saying yes all the time, you hinder those you love because they will never learn to find solutions on their own. You also drain yourself and sometimes end up with resentment towards the other person.

People are creatures of habit. If they do something long enough, it becomes normal for them. If you keep saying yes, they will keep asking.

I am a giving and helpful person. If I know that someone really needs help, I will help them out. But sometimes people unintentionally will use you and keep asking. Especially if you keep saying yes. In one situation in particular it was draining me but I felt that I just could not cut things off and leave the person high and dry. How do I say no without them being mad at me? Then it hit me, if this person could not be thankful for the stuff I was able to do for them in the past then forget them. I have a family, a life and things that I needed to do. My help was privilege and not a right.

Remember when I said people are creatures of habit? Well if they keep asking and you keep saying no, they will stop asking, lol.

It is okay to be selfish and not give soo much of yourself. It is also okay to help out when you can. But if saying yes to something is going to stress you out, make things harder on you, or just take too much time when you need to do other things, just say NO!!!

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