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Monday, January 28, 2008

Crabs in a barrel


I remember when I was pregnant with Bria. Everything I thought about changed. I no longer cared about having a military career. All I wanted to do was to be the best wife and mother I could be. I began to set a plan in motion to get out. I didn't want to leave too soon and give up some of the benefits I had worked so hard for so I had to be wise. Shortly after she was born I started working towards getting off of active duty.

After enduring some roadblocks, I was approved for Palace Chase. This allowed me to separate from active duty and finish my time in the Reserves. I remember being so happy that I was going to be a stay at home mom. That was until I realized I was in a barrel full of crabs. I remember hearing someone tell me about the crabs in a barrel scenario. They stated that as soon as a crab is near the top of the barrel and about to escape, the others will pull it back down because they are still stuck in the barrel so they don't want another to be able to get out.

People tried to discourage me. "What about your career?" "How are you guys going to live off of one salary?" "Why don't you just finish out your 4 years?" "Are you sure you want to do that?" Those were the questions posed to me. You see most of them were secretly envious. They had fallen into the active duty trap. Most people go in thinking they will do 4 years, make some money, go to school and then leave. But they don't save, they don't prepare and, before they know it, they have done 4 years with nothing to show for it. They have no choice but to reenlist.

I was smarter than most. As soon as I got to my base I went back to school, I was very good with my money and Thomas and I were already living off of one salary. Crabs in a barrel.

Unfortunately for the nay saying I wasn't a crab. I was a dove who accidentally stumbled upon their barrel. So while they may have been waiting for me to get to the top just to pull me out, they couldn't because I realized I had wings and soared into my destiny.

I said all of this to say:
1) Be careful of who you share your dreams and plans with. Some people are miserable and don't want to see others happy. They will kill your dreams faster than you can say boo. They are crabs that will pull you down as soon as they know you are trying to get up and out. Only share things with people who will love and support you.

2) If you realize you are in a barrel of crabs, you must either realize you are dove and fly or evolve into one and get the heck out. You must know who you are and whose you are. Your environment doesn't define you. Even if you are a crab, you don't have to remain one. Step out on faith and be the person God has called you to be. Or else you will end up on a plate on top of table next to a salad, some garlic cheese biscuits, and melted butter waiting to be cracked and eaten with the rest of the crabs. Q

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I love this idea...its so true.

Be careful of who you share your dreams and plans with. Some people are miserable and don't want to see others happy.