I am not my hair!!!!

Yeah I know that line is so cliche but it's fitting. On Sunday I decided to finally cut my hair after over a year of going back and forth about it. I told my cousin I would wait until after her wedding and took some more time to think on it. I was torn for so many reasons. I love having long hair. I love the looks on folks faces when they see my hair. Especially other black women who never thought this "type" of hair could grow so long. I was one of them. I was the little girl who had a decent length of hair but envied those who had long hair and appeared to be "mixed." I too believed my hair wouldn't grow "that" long. But as I got older, I realized a lot of it had nothing to do with genetics and more to do with the care and nurturing of my hair. I had plenty of examples in my own family.

But then the itch to cut was calling me. I got tired of fighting with it. In these last months, I'd begun to slack on my hair. I knew then I had to do it. I'm a hair snob. I like seeing healthy hair whether relaxed or natural and I know my hair wasn't being done right. It wasn't right for me to treat it like that. So instead of going down the same path, I decided to let it go.

I think everyone else took the cut harder than I did. But I get it, I really do. I know I have been an inspiration for so many people. I know I have given out countless tips, and a lot of advice to women over the years. I know they would come to my blog just to look at my pics and use them for encouragement. I get it.

It's amazing how my identity was intertwined with the length of my hair. That is one of the first things people comment on when they meet me or see me. The day I cut my hair, I went to the store. I saw this girl with long hair and she looked at mine. I would be lying if I said I wasn't insecure for a moment. I wonder if folks see me and think I've always had short hair. Should I carry around a picture of myself with long hair to prove I had short hair by choice? I quickly shook off any feelings of insecurity and continued on. I know and that's all that matters.

Today is day 3 and I have no regrets about my decision. I've been overwhelmed by the response from people when I tell them about donating my hair. When I look in the mirror, or rub my hands over my head, I smile. I smile because I love the way I look and feel. I love knowing my hair is going to bless someone who is battling cancer. I love it because this is another beginning for me. I love it because I am showing my daughters that there is more to me, to them than what is on the outside. I love it because I know my hair is going to grow back. I love it because I did it for ME and not for anyone else.

I am a wife, mother, sister, aunt, cousin, friend, mentor, business owner, blogger, student, and minister. I am honest, loving, giving, happy, blessed, free, and kind. I listen to people, I pray for them, I give of my time to others, and try to be a blessing when I can. I am a child of the Most High. I am so much more than the hair on my head. Q