Learning to say no

Saying no is hard for a lot of people to do. Especially when it involves the people you love the most like your kids, your parents, or your SO. But we all need to learn how to say no and use it. When you get into the habit of saying yes all the time, you hinder those you love because they will never learn to find solutions on their own. You also drain yourself and sometimes end up with resentment towards the other person.

People are creatures of habit. If they do something long enough, it becomes normal for them. If you keep saying yes, they will keep asking.

I am a giving and helpful person. If I know that someone really needs help, I will help them out. But sometimes people unintentionally will use you and keep asking. Especially if you keep saying yes. In one situation in particular it was draining me but I felt that I just could not cut things off and leave the person high and dry. How do I say no without them being mad at me? Then it hit me, if this person could not be thankful for the stuff I was able to do for them in the past then forget them. I have a family, a life and things that I needed to do. My help was privilege and not a right.

Remember when I said people are creatures of habit? Well if they keep asking and you keep saying no, they will stop asking, lol.

It is okay to be selfish and not give soo much of yourself. It is also okay to help out when you can. But if saying yes to something is going to stress you out, make things harder on you, or just take too much time when you need to do other things, just say NO!!!

Love and Pain

Pain is the one thing that all of us share as human beings. No matter what color, culture, age, race, or country. We have all had our share of pain in our lives. Love is what we all need and want. It is what keeps us going when we feel down, what pushes us when things get rough, and what we will do anything for.

I was just thinking about some of my friends and how love and pain connects me to all of them. First there is me, Queneesha. I experienced the pain of not having a father around when I was growing up but I have the love of my husband and 3 beautiful girls. Then there is my bestfriend Mel. We share the love of having girls 2 days apart from each other. We shared the joy of being pregnant and was in the hospital at the same time. Mel also experienced the pain of losing her mother right before delivering her beautiful daughter. Then there is Monica who has the love of her wonderful husband Robby. She has also experienced the pain of losing her mother like Mel, and also her father. She has also struggled with infertility. I also have a friend named Danielle. Danielle gave birth to a boy named Cavion the same year and in the same hospital that Mel and I gave birth to our girls. But like Monica she has experienced the loss of her mother and in 2005 she lost Cavion to cancer. She is now also like Monica battling with infertility and going through the necessary treatments in order to conceive. Last but not least Chernae. She is my friend from college who also gave birth to a little girl named Precious in 1998. But like Danielle she lost Precious.

All of us come from different walks of life. We have had our share of pain but we also knows what it is like to have love, feel loved, give love, and want love. So instead of focusing on our differences, take the time to dig deeper and get to know someone before you judge them. You will be surprised to see how much you have in common. God is love. Q

First things first

What is the first thing you do in the morning? When something good happens, what is the first thing you do? What about when something bad happens? What is the first thing you do when you are scared? What about when you have a tough decision to make? The first determines the rest!!! Think about that and I will elaborate more soon. GOD is love. Q

How strong is your Temple?

"The strength of your temple determines your outer response to life" Juanita Bynam I am reading "The Threshing Floor" by Juanita Bynam. I took that quote out of the book. When I read it, it hit me like a brick. So how strong is your temple? How do you respond to the hard situations that life throws at you? What areas (or temples) in life do you feel you need to strengthen? Be blessed. Q

Just Because

Because of who You are I give You glory
Because of who You are I give You praise
Because of who You are I will lift my voice and say
Lord I worship You because of who You are
Yes I worship You because of who You are...

That is a song we sing during praise and worship. This past week that song spoke to my spirit. Often times we only seek GOD when we want or need something. We fast and pray like crazy for a breakthrough. Then we shout, rejoice, testify, and praise Him when it happens. It is always because of something and not because of "Who He is".

I heard someone say that if the Lord never does another thing for you, He has already done enough. Those words are soo very true. Thankfully we serve an awesome and loving God. Like any Father, He wants us His children to have the very best. So when we do the things that please Him, He blesses us. He doesn't have to but He does. Isn't it about time we do something for HIM?

We as humans look high and low for our definition of love. We want people to love us just as we are but yet we don't do the same for God. We want Him when it suits us or when we think we can get something out of it. When we really need to just thank Him for being Him. Everyday He keeps death away from us, everyday we have food on our tables, clothes on our back, things that we take for granted. Things that He gives to us. But what if it was all gone? Would you do like Job's wife encouraged him? She told him to curse your God and die.

No matter what happens, we need to praise God for who He is. It is He that made us. It is He who keeps us. It is He that loves us with the perfect love that only He can give because He is perfect. Jesus died so that we would not have to. He never sinned, never cussed anyone out or wrote people off like we do. Even the very people who beat Him, spat on Him, and mocked Him. He died for them too. He made the ultimate sacrafice. So instead of going to God expecting something, just praise Him and thank Him for being who He is. Q

Warning for readers

Yes you are reading the sign correctly. I am not from here.

Most of you know that I am a Christian and because of that I believe I am an alien. GOD who lives in heaven created me. I was sent to earth for a purpose, to help others and lead them to Christ. Then when my work is done, I will one day return to my heavenly home to live with the LORD for eternity.

I wanted to post this so that you the reader will understand where I am coming from. Because I am not from here I see things differently, believe differently, and live differently. I don't do what is pleasing and acceptable by man's standards. Instead I follow the calling of the ONE who made me. I don't think I am better than anyone, nor I am perfect. But each day I wake up, it is because GOD allowed it and I therefore serve Him. So please do not post here to debate with me or to change my mind because it is already made up.

This year will make 10 years sinceI rededicated my life to Christ. It has been a long road filled with ups and downs. But I can honestly say that everyday with Jesus is sweeter than the day before. So if you don't like what I believe, or the thought of a christian take on things offends you.... LEAVE and don't read or respond to my blog. I am not here to judge but simply want to say what is going on in "MY" world. You can post in your own blog whatever you feel. But if you choose to stay, know that GOD will most likely be mentioned EVERYDAY. I will not throw it up in your face in every single post but know that I will acknowledge Him.

You have been warned. Q

Here I am

Yup that is a pic of me. It is kind of old. It was taken over 4 years ago. Back then my hair was relaxed and we had just moved to New Mexico. I was getting over a short bout of depression. I was sad about moving here. My best friend was in Georgia, my family was only 3 hours away. We were leaving everything we knew. Our first house, the place our kids were born, the place we met and fell in love. It wasn't serious but I did needed to snap out of it. Which I did. Unfortunately by the time I started to get my mind right and started working out, I got pregnant again. What can you do? Life happens sometimes and you just deal. Anyway, I wanted to put a face with the words. Take care Q

Happy New Year 2007

One of my resolutions this year is to write in my blog at least 3 times a week so one down, 2 more to go. This was the first New Year's in a long time that I spent at home. We had 2 snowstorms in the past week and church was cancelled. I love bringing in the New Year in the house of the LORD. This year it was Thomas, my mom, the girls and myself at home. We just danced around and I said my prayer of Thanks.

Do you have any resolutions? I have a couple. One of them was already mentioned, the other is to continue to lose weight and get back in shape. I am already down 22lbs since I started last year. I also want to pay my house off. It may be hard to do but even if I don't I want to have knocked a good bit off. I also want to finish writing my book, spend more time with family and self, and to grow my businesses. Each year I also make it a resolution to get even closer to GOD. Some people think they (resolutions) are dumb. Although most of them are broken, I think a lot of people do make changes for the better. You don't have to start on the 1st of January, just do what you can, when you can. GOD is love. Q